I’m sure you feel it, too. The craving. When you
catch a whiff of musty leaves on your walk to work, or when pull on a wool
sweater that still smells a little sheepy -- those earthy, beasty smells make you
want one thing: stinky cheese.
No? Seriously? Okay, I’m alone here, or maybe you
just don’t want to admit it. There is something about November weather – all
this dampness and decay – that makes yeasty, feisty cheeses kind of
appealing.
That’s why I’m excited to tell you about Stinky Føttene (pictured above), a new beefy champ from Hook’s Cheese Company out of Mineral Point, Wisconsin. I am especially proud of Tony and
Julie Hook for calling this cheese what it is. The name literally meets “stinky
feet.”
In the cheese world,
people shy away from using the word “stinky” or “whiffy.” Most mongers and
makers will use the term “pungent,” as if this is a kindler, gentler way to
refer to certain “interesting” cheeses with “aromatic” qualities.
I prefer not to tiptoe.
Stinky cheese has always been all right with me. I like to eat it with dark
bread and dark beer, preferably in a darkish kitchen with maybe a little Hüsker Dü playing in the background.
Gateway Stinkers
Stinky Føttene is a good
gateway stinker. “For a stinky cheese, it’s pretty palatable,” my friend Austin
said, when I served him a wedge at a recent harvest party. My friend Tracy
deemed it “the IPA of cheese.” I’d have to agree. Our wedge – airdropped in
from a Wisconsin source – didn’t necessitate any nose plugs.
Still, it had all the qualities
I like in a stinky washed-rind cheese: a gooey orange rind (from a good wash
with saline or booze), a creamy texture, and a toothsome beef-stewy quality
that is characteristic of stinky cheese.
What makes a cheese stinktastic?
Most are washed-rind cheeses, which is a style of cheese that developed out of
monastic cultures. Many early monasteries produced beer or spirits alongside
cheese, and some sweet bald Man Of The Cloth finally put the two together. Think of Epoisses, a famous Googoo Cluster from the Trappists.
Washed-rind cheeses are
literally bathed in a solution – brandy, beer, etc. – that adds flavor and
moisture. No surprise, eating these stinkers alongside Trappist ales and dark
liquor makes for a very merry pairing.
Must-Try Whiffies: From Mild to Wild
If you are sensitive to
stink, ask a cheesemonger to help you find the right round for you. Stinky
cheeses tend to get whiffier as they age, so ask for a young buck. In the
store, the cheese might hit you like a herd of rowdy bulls, but at home – with the right
condiments and libations – you’re going to find that it lows like a calf.
Below are some great seasonal stinkers. I like to serve these before a big meal – or as a meal – because they pair well with other strong flavors, like pickles, cured meat, dark beer, spiced nuts, and even marmalade.
Ardrahan – Ireland’s version of a stinky cheese. It’s so gentle, it purrs.
Anton’s Red Love – It’s a stinky pillow-top, which means Not Too
Stinky. The texture is silken. I could sleep on this, it’s so featherbed good.
Red Hawk – A not-too-stinky dream puff from California's Cow Girl Creamery. Rich and faintly
peanutty. One of my favorites.
Hooligan – Plenty stinky but so delicious. Think of a cow barn with a tire swing -- you’ll taste both. This is one elegant but intense cheese, and it’s made by a
former English teacher and his mom, in Connecticut. Oh, please. It’s cute and stinky. It’s the Hello Kitty of
Stinky Cheeses.
Stinking Bishop – Need I say more?
Epoisses – The only cheese I serve on Thanksgiving Day, always with baguette
rounds and celery sticks. It’s the dip du jour for stink-loving Brady
Bunchettes.
Limburger – A truly repugnant smelling cheese that has the taste and texture of onion frosting, although it never tastes quite as strong to me as it smells. One man
makes Limburger in the U.S., and he tells me it’s good on toast with a smear of
strawberry jam. I like to make Limburger Helper.
Full Discosure: Stinky Fottene was sent to me as a sample, among other Wisconsin whiffies that I requested for a Thanksgiving Cheese Board.
